Menunaikan Janji - Presentation on Let's Become Sexually Healthy Muslim Youths

>> Wednesday, August 26, 2009


As promised, here are the outlines of my presentation on the above topic which I presented last month. Unfortunately, I can't share you the graphic and tables. Just the words......

Let’s become Sexually Healthy Muslim Youths !
(Presented on July 12th, 2009 during YMP’s Knowlegde & Arts Tour 2009, at Main Auditorium Akademi Islam, Univ. Malaya, Kuala Lumpur)

Why this topic ?
To guide and assist Muslim youths to be sexually healthy, so that they can help their friends ( Muslims and non-Muslims) to be sexually healthy too!

Adolescence : Definition ( United Nations, 1997)
The stage of life during which individuals reach sexual maturity; it is a period of transition from puberty to maturity.

Adolescents : Age Limits ( 1998 Joint Statement by WHO, UNICEF & UNPFA)
Adolescents : 10 to 19 years
(Early adolescence : 10-14 years, Late adolescence : 15-19 years )
Youths : 15 to 24 years
Young people : 10 to 24 years

World Population : Adolescents
Currently, 20% of world population

Y : Yearning attention
O : Optimistic
U : Unrealistic
T : Talented
H : Happy always

Adolescents Today:

Understanding Contemporary Teens –
`The Five Love languages of Teenagers’ book written by Gary Chapman

1. Similarities with Past Teenage Generations
—Facing Physical and Mental Changes
—Entering the Age of Reason
—Confronting Personal Morality and Values
—Thinking about Sexuality and Marriage
—Questioning the Future

2. Five Fundamental Differences with past teenage generations
•Advancement in Technology
•Knowledge of and Exposure to Violence
•The Fragmented Family
•Knowledge and Exposure to Sexuality
•Neutral Moral & Religious Values

Sexuality : What does it mean?
—A central aspect of being human throughout life that encompasses :
Sex, gender identities and roles, sexual orientation, eroticism
Pleasure, intimacy, and reproduction.
—Sexuality is experienced and expressed in :
thoughts, fantasies, desires, beliefs, attitudes, values, behaviours, practices, roles and relationships.
—While sexuality can include all of these dimensions, not all of them are always experienced or expressed.

Reproductive Health (WHO)
—A state of physical, mental, and social well-being in all matters relating to the reproductive system at all stages of life.
Implies that people are able to have :
—a satisfying and safe sex life
—the capability to reproduce
—the freedom to decide if, when, and how often to do so.

Sexual health (WHO)
—A state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality; it is not merely the absence of disease, dysfunction or infirmity.
—Requires :
—a positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships
—the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence.

Adolescent Reproductive Health (ARH)
Health indicators :
—Age at first intercourse
—Premarital sex
—Adolescent pregnancy & childbearing
—Contraceptive use
—STI & HIV/AIDS among adolescents

For reproductive & sexual health to be attained and maintained, the reproductive & sexual rights of all persons must be respected, protected and fulfilled

Reproductive Rights - WHO
—Right to life
—Right to bodily integrity and security
—Right to privacy
—Right to the benefits of scientific progresses
—Right to seek, receive and impart information
—Right to education
—Right to health
—Right to equality in marriage and divorce
—Right for non-discriminatory treatment

Sexual Rights (WHO)
The right of all persons, free of coercion, discrimination and violence, to:
—the highest attainable standard of sexual health, including access to sexual and reproductive health care services;
—seek, receive and impart information related to sexuality;
—sexuality education;
—respect for bodily integrity;
—choose their partner;
—decide to be sexually active or not;
—consensual sexual relations;
—consensual marriage;
—decide whether or not, and when, to have children; and
—pursue a satisfying, safe and pleasurable sexual life.

The responsible exercise of human rights requires that all persons respect the rights of others.

Who are sexually healthy teens?
Sexually healthy teens are those who:
appreciate their bodies
take responsibility for their own behaviours
communicate effectively and respectfully
express love and intimacy in a way which is appropriate for their age

Malaysian Adolescents : Dilemma & Challenges Relating to their Sexuality
Sex on Campus (NST, August 18th, 2006)
Mazlin Mohamad Mokhtar, Faculty of Medicine UiTM
KAP study on Sexual & Reproductive Health among Malaysian college & university students (2005)
—727 respondents from 2 IPTA & 2 IPTS
—50% sexually active
—80% did not practise contraception
—34% thought condoms cannot help prevent HIV spread
—25% thought HIV can be transmitted through mosquito, bed bug or flea bites
—60% thought a man could tell when a woman has STD
Physical pleasure seems to outweigh the risk of pregnancy & STDs among Malaysian university & college students
The Spectrum of Sexual Morality :

Sexual Liberationists Balanced view of Islam Traditional Moralist

Views of Traditional Moralist views
Judeo-Christian influence - Sexuality – basically wicked and negative
Sexual intercourse regarded as impure, evil, undesirable, destructive, and as if it were characteristic of the guilty, fallen and succumb to desire
Celibacy is the highest form of purity, marriage will pollute chastity and piety
Marriage is purely for procreation and binding until death intervenes. Dissolution of marriage ( divorce) : not allowed
Women : the devil advocates & associates, the gatekeeper of hell, luring men to succumb to their sexual desire

Views of Sexual Liberationists
· Freedom should be ensured for every individual, as it does not interfere with that of others;
· All inborn sexual desires and aptitudes should be freely nurtured and brought to fulfilment without any inhibition or restraint, since their curbing or frustration leads to disorders of the ego; and
· Any natural desire subsides when it is fulfilled, and it becomes insistent and excessive when it is subjected to any negative moral restraint or ill conceived prohibition.
· Emotional instability arises from discriminating among the natural instincts and desires,
· Equal nurturing and development of all human inclinations is necessary for personal and societal well being.
· To avoid constant preoccupation with sex, the only correct way is to lift all moral restraints and social prohibitions .

Balanced views on Sexuality : Islamic perspectives
· Sexuality is considered part of our identity as human beings
· (Quran, 30:21)
· And one of His signs is that He created mates for you, that you may find rest in them, and He envisaged between you love and compassion ...
· Sexual relations are confined to marriage between a wife and husband
· Sexual relations assume a prominent role in the overall well-being of the marriage, not only for childbearing
· Sex is the ultimate expression of love and is a total physical and emotional encounter.
· Al-Quran ,2:187)
· "They are your garments and you are their garments."
· Saying of the Prophet (PBUH)
· "And when the one of you makes love (has sex) it is a rewardable charity. "
· `The right for orgasm’
"If any of you has sex with his wife let he be true to her. If he attains his pleasure before
her then he shouldn't hurry her away until she also attains her pleasure." (Anas )
· Foreplay :
"Let not the one of you fall upon his wife like a beast falls. It is more appropriate to send a messenger before the act"

Sexual Morality : Responsibilities of All
lAl-Quran: An-Nuur : 30 & 31
Say to the believing men that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts; that is purer for them; surely Allah is Aware of what they do.
And say to the believing women that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts and do not display their ornaments except what appears thereof, and let them wear their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their ornaments except to their husbands or their fathers, or the fathers of their husbands, or their sons, or the sons of their husbands, or their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or the male servants not having need (of women), or the children who have not attained knowledge of what is hidden of women; and let them not strike their feet so that what they hide of their ornaments may be known; and turn to Allah all of you, O believers! so that you may be successful.

What does it really mean?
lAl-Quran, Al Baqarah : 223
Your wives are a tilth for you, so go into your tilth when you like, and do good beforehand for yourselves, and be careful (of your duty) to Allah, and know that you will meet Him, and give good news to the believers
lAl-Quran, An Nisaa : 34
Men are in charge of women , because Allah hath men the one of them to excel the other , and because they spend of their property ( for the support of women ) . So good women are the obedient , guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded . As for those from whom ye fear rebellion , admonish them and banish them to beds apart , and scourge them . Then if they obey you , seek not a way against them . Lo! Allah is ever High Exalted , Great.

Sexual Ethics :
Female & male modesty - Male sense of honour concerning female members of a household
Female & male chastity, faithfulness to spouses;
Female & male inclination to cover her/his private parts, or her/his aversion to exposing any bodily nakedness in public;
Prohibition of adultery, interdiction of any visual or physical intimacy with other than one's legal spouse;
Prohibition of incest, or marriage between persons too closely related;
Avoidance of sexual intercourse with menstruating women;
Debarring pornography or obscenity;
Treating celibacy as either too saintly or undesirable

COUNSELING ADOLESCENTS ABOUT SEXUAL HEALTH Catherine Stevens-Simon, MD, and Richard L. Street, Jr., PhD
Three counselling methods
Counselling technique : 5 As
Counselling on Adolescent Reproductive Health (ARH): Developmental Approach

Counselling for teens who are sexually inactive :
• Empower them to maintain abstinence – best contraceptive method to avoid pregnancy & STI
• Provide adequate information on sexuality
• Increase self-esteem and confidence

The Solution to the sexual-related health epidemics
Postponing Sex Is The Only Solution

Postponing sexual activity until marriage with an uninfected mate is the only way for adolescents to be 100% sure of avoiding STD infection and pregnancy. Delaying sex until marriage is the most medically sound advice we can give people in today's environment.
Statement released by Medical Institute of Sexual Health

Strong Religious Views Decrease Teen’s Likelihood to Have SexTeens-particularly girls,with strong religious views are less likely to have sex than are less religious teens, largely because their religious views lead them to view the consequences of having sex negatively.
According to the recent analysis by NICHD Health Survey, religion reduces the likelihood of adolescents engaging in early sex by shaping their attitudes and beliefs about sexual activity.

Report in NIH News, released by National Inst. Of Health (NIH) USA –
April 2, 2003


>> Wednesday, August 19, 2009


Alhamdulillah, rasa tak sabar nak menjejak kaki ke bulan pesta ibadah Ramadhan Kareem hujung minggu ni. Semoga kita semua dapat memanfaat setiap peluang berbuat amal kebajikan sepanjang bulan yang mulia ini.

Ada satu lagi sebab kenapa Dr.Har excited sangat dengan Ramadhan kali ni. Alhamdulillah, masjid baru Alam Damai yang diberi nama Masjid Al Muhlisin, akan digunakan buat julung-julung kalinya semasa solat tarawih kali ni. And guess what, masjid tu betul-betul depan rumah Dr.Har! Seminggu ni, jiran tetangga Alam Damai, terutamanya fasa Damai Bakti berkampung kat `rumah baru' kami tu - masing2 bersemangat turun solat berjamaah. Maghrib - jemaah lelaki sampai tiga saf! Jemaah wanita & kanak-kanak lelaki- satu saf. Moga semangat ini berkekalan sampai bila-bila.

Ustaz Zul dan Dr. Har jadi AJK Kariah masjid. Alhamdulillah semua AJK setuju kita kena jadikan masjid baru kami ni -~REMAJA -FRIENDLY'. So, kenalah kami bersungguh-sungguh menjadikan aktiviti masjid menarik kepada remaja, agar hati mereka tersangkut kepada masjid!

Tu dulu, nanti kita sambung lagi, InsyaAllah.



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